LIKE A BAT OUT OF BED

Duh duh duh duh duh/ Woke up this morning
Duh duh duh duh duh/ My wife had left me
Duh duh duh duh duh / A note in the kitchen
Duh duh duh duh duh/ To say she was called into work early
And it’s symptomatic of my life
That I don’t undergo much trouble or strife
And it’s never really been my goal
But I’m just not very rock or roll.
I never started believing
I’m not living on a prayer
If it ever smells like teen spirit
I’ll be there with my air freshen-air
I’ve only got nine problems
And an itch is one
My local Chinese takeaway
Is the House of the Rising Sun.
Won’t drive my Rolls Royce into swimming pools
It might upset some water polo
The last time I said ‘Fuck the Police’
Was when Sting went solo
I take walks on the mild side
I nap like a three-toed sloth
I’m sure that an Iron Maiden
Is a gadget for pressing my clothes
A Black Sabbath just means I can’t wash my car
Just sit inside holding my flannel
The only time I’m bi curious
Is watching the shopping channel
I’m not as cool as Johnny Cash
And there’s no puzzle as to why
I gave hair colouring to a man in Reno
Just to watch him dye
So it’s farewell to fast living
And the sense of shelter that it warps
I’ll be taking the back roads, and not to hell
And at best I’ll leave an average looking corpse.